Holy Taco for May 13

Today on the Taco:

Gilbert Gottfried Voices Videogames, Forgets How To Gilbert Gottfried

Shrieking comedic genius Gilbert Gottfried recently added his voice to a bunch of video games, in what could’ve been the best thing in humanity’s history. It ended being total crap, as Gottfried played it almost entirely straight, rendering the whole thing entirely boring. It’s the most disappointing Gottfried-related event since Aflac stopped letting him be the duck.

Roger Goodell’s #AskCommish Hijacked Because Why Wouldn’t It Be?

Corporate/celebrity hashtags never work, as Roger Goodell learned all too quickly when he tried to get #AskCommish trending. It did, but not at all in the way he had hoped. But he should have known this would happen. History has shown you’re more likely to see a leprechaun marrying Elvis with the Loch Ness Monster serving as Justice of the Peace than a hated elitist’s hashtag campaign go off without a million billion hitches.

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