Holy Taco For May 14

Smart Octopus Unscrews Jar, Too Dumb to Actually Escape:

Humans have a fetish for any animal it deems smart enough to kill us all. Sadly, this rarely happens, as what initially looks like evil genius ends up being nothing more than dumb, boring ol’ instinct. Case in point: this octopus, who unscrews the lid of a jar all by his lonesome, and then stays in the jar because instinct tells him to hide and hunt. “Fuck freedom and doom, my cerebellum commands me to stay here and wait for prawns!”

So much for our twisted fantasies of C’thulhu finally making a grand appearance in our humble reality.

Reviewing 51 Seconds of the Million-Dollar Wu-Tang Clan Album:

The Wu-Tang Clan has a new album coming out, and only one copy will be for sale. You can’t buy it either, unless you have over $5 million to blow. Everyone else will have to pay to enter a Wu-approved museum and listen to it in there.

Problem is, it’s likely not worth it. 51 seconds of the album got released recently, and it’s, well, just a song. It sounds exactly like what you’d expect from a Wu-Tang Clan album. That’s a good thing, but why they felt the need to stick “a good thing” in a damn jewelry case, turn it into an exhibit at the Louvre, and charge some mark millions of dollars for the right to upload it to BitTorrent is beyond me.


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