Holy Taco for June 9 AND June 10

Aliens took over my brain last night and made me forget to post my daily link to words I made. Luckily, the aliens are now dead and baking at 450 degrees for 90 minutes, so I’ma post a doubleshot while waiting for the timer to ding.

FLAIR: Local Hack Writes Fake News, About to Fool Everyone…Again

Breaking news, as yet another unfunny troll with only the slightest possible grasp of what “satire” actually means has created a “fake news” website and full of total bullshit that the Internet will soon angrily believe without question. State officials, along with anybody who actually reads an article rather than just skimming the headline and hulk smashing their keyboard seconds later, are flabbergasted as to why this keeps happening.

ARN: Meet Mark Wilson, The Man Who Loves Poop More Than Life Itself

And now for some poop jokes, courtesy of a guy who enjoys nothing more than talking about shit for hours on end. The pure repetition of “I love shit, and I love taking a shit” is almost hypnotic.

ROMA: Unappreciated Awful: Orskog Bank’s Awkward Dance Video

Here’s an old video that somehow didn’t go as viral as it should have. A bunch of Swedish bankers dance and prance their way through a cheesy music video, because bad conga dancing and blatant mockery of the handicapped is exactly how you draw in business.

MONGO: We Get It. Nicolas Cage is Wacky. Enough Already

For awhile, Nicolas Cage being the ultimate scenery-chewing actor was pretty chuckle-worthy. But now the joke is old, thanks to a billion people not shutting up about it. Time to let the Crazy Cage thing rest forever.


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